10 Ways to Naturally Increase Your Sex Drive

Exercise Regularly

Physical activity has been scientifically proven to increase your self-confidence, improve your body image, and rev up your sex drive. I know it can be challenging to start a regular exercise regimen, but what better motivation than increasing your libido? Aim for about an hourlong workout, three to five days per week. (And if you’re not already working out, even about 30 minutes a day will translate to results.)

Be careful not to overdo it though! In particular, an excessive amount of exercise can actually decrease your sex drive. High-intensity training for over an hour—like long runs—five or more times a week could have a negative impact on your sex drive, research suggests.

Get More Sleep

So many people get competitive about their sleep, claiming that they can function on just a few hours a night. Unfortunately for those people, sleep plays a huge role in your sex drive.

I always say that sex drive is a luxury for the body. If your body barely has the resources to function, it’s not going to divert any of those resources towards feeling desire. Aim to get seven to eight hours per night. Yes, seven to eight!

Decrease Stress

When you’re stressed, your body creates the hormone cortisol. Cortisol effectively decreases the amount of testosterone in the body, and as you probably know, testosterone is one of the most important hormones for male desire. It’s a direct relationship—the less testosterone you have, the less likely you are to feel desire.

Plus, stress puts your body in “fight or flight” mode. Excess stress triggers that “under attack” instinct, as your body’s nervous system tries to determine whether to stay and fight, or move fast to get out of trouble.

There’s no biological reason you should be feeling desire when your body thinks it’s under attack—so yes, stress will hurt your sex drive. There are lots of ways to decrease your stress levels, including exercise, getting more sleep, and mindfulness and meditation.

Evaluate Your Diet

People always ask me what supplements they should take to increase their sex drive. I think that’s the wrong question to ask. Your diet plays a much more fundamental role in changing your sex drive. You can’t eat Taco Bell every day, pop a few supplement pills, and expect to have the libido of a 16-year-old.
Entire books have been written about libido-boosting diets, but here are the simple rules I share with my clients:

• Eat foods as close to their natural state as possible, as often as possible. (Limit processed foods.)
• Eat whole-grain carbs. Minimize white carbs like white flour, white rice, and white potatoes.
• Eat more veggies.
• Eat less meat.
• Drink plenty of water.
• Don’t drink soda. (Even diet soda.)

Tackle Performance Issues

Performance issues are one of the most surprising causes of low libido. The men I work with rarely make the connection. It can be a vicious cycle: If you’re having troubles with your erection or your orgasmic timing, the stress and anxiety you may feel over that sexual performance can tank your sex drive. You may feel so self-conscious about not being able to perform that you may start avoiding sex altogether.

My suggestion: If you work with a sex therapist or an online course to conquer your performance issues, your libido will come roaring back, too.

Masturbate

A lot of men erroneously believe that masturbation will deplete your sex drive. The truth is, masturbation can help you feel even more desire. Of course, you don’t want to overdo it, but regular masturbation can help you feel more in touch with your desire. The more pleasure you experience, the more you’re naturally going to keep wanting that pleasure. If you feel that ejaculation decreases your energy or desire, try masturbating but not allowing yourself to orgasm. It can be a thrilling change of pace.

Exercise Your PC Muscles

Your PC muscles are one of the easiest ways to increase your sex drive. They are located in your pelvis, and drape from your pubic bone to your tailbone like a hammock. Exercising these muscles naturally helps you develop a better connection to your body, and think about your penis on a more regular basis. The exercises also help bring more blood flow to your genitals, which can also help increase your sex drive. PC exercise can even decrease performance issues. Try doing a set of 10 quick pulses and 20 longer holds.

Address Relationship Problems

Most of the men I work with expect their sex drives to function independently from everything else going on in their lives. As you’ve probably already guessed, that’s simply not how it works. Tons of different factors affect your sex drive, including what’s going on in your relationship (if you’re in one).

If you and your partner have been arguing or have unresolved issues, your sex drive is going to be negatively impacted. Addressing relationship issues can be as simple as having more communication, or as complex as starting couples counseling. Remember: While it may be awkward in the short term, better communication is key to healthy long-term relationships.

Make the Time for Sex

This is another suggestion that most people don’t ever think about! If you don’t have the time in your busy day to even have sex in the first place, your body likely won’t desire it. Fortunately, it can be really fun to work together with your partner to create more space in your lives for intimacy. 

Have Better Sex

So few people make the connection between the desire for sex and the quality of the sex you do have. If you’re not having great sex, it doesn’t make much sense to crave it! If your sex drive feels low, ask yourself, “Do I have crave-able sex?” If it doesn’t, then you have some really fun homework ahead of you!